Unschooling Pros and Cons: Is It Right for Your Family?
Are you weighing the pros and cons of unschooling? Still trying to decide if the benefits outweigh the challenges?
I was there, too.
My only regret is that I actively pushed the idea away for our first few years of homeschooling.
Don’t be like me. 🤦♀️
Read this list of both the pros and cons (yes, there are some!) from an unschooling mom, formerly a private school teacher, and decide what is best for your family.
What is Unschooling?
Unschooling, also known as interest-led learning or self-directed learning, is an educational philosophy and homeschooling style that prioritizes following the interests of the learner.
It rejects the idea that you must follow a teacher-led, pre-determined, linear curricumlum that follows a specific timeline and course for everyone.
Unschooling allows learners to pursue their own passions and learn what he or she see as valuable. In this sense, as a learner is more invested in the cause, he or she will develop a deeper understanding of the material, all without any formal schooling.
The Pros of Unschooling
✅Fosters a lifelong love of learning.
What is the point of getting an education? Are we meant to be learners just from the ages of 6-18?
NO!
Life is a continuous learning journey. It is not a blip in time between the ages of 6-18 from 8:00 am until 3 pm, Monday through Friday.
We are all born with a desire to learn. A natural curiosity stamped into our DNA.
We ask questions. Explore. Seek out information.
Unschooling supports all of that….for a lifetime. Learners are not only allowed to follow their own interests, ask questions, and seek answers; they are encouraged to do so.
This was, in fact, my number one reason for choosing to homeschool, and ultimately, unschool.
✅Allows for a customizable education.
Students learn best when their education is tailored to their own needs and interests.
Unschooling provides just that….an education tailored to the learner.
No more pre-determined, one-size-fits-all curriculum.
No more following the recommendations of others who may or may not have ever been in education, except perhaps as students themselves.
Just solid, customized learning geared straight at what makes the learner tick.
✅Promotes self-motivation and independence.
Unschoolers are self-motivated learners who are driven to pursue their own goals, overcome challenges, and achieve success.
They don’t rely on extrinsic rewards like grades or the fear of being humiliated to drive forward their learning, but instead pursue knowledge in pursuit of their own goals.
This self-motivation allows them to take ownership of their choices rather than relying on someone else giving them instructions, thus making them more independent.
✅Provides freedom and flexibility.
Who doesn’t love the freedom to make one’s own choices AND the flexibility in which to do so?
Interest-led learning is about choosing what you, as the learner, want to learn about.
No more attending required classes that you have zero interest in.
No more memorizing information for a test just to forget it when the test is over.
Unschoolers have the freedom to choose what they want to spend time learning about, how they learn it, and when they learn it.
✅Builds family bonds and connections.
Perhaps the best part about unschooling is the connections you build as a family.
Absent the checklists and demands of traditional schooling (and even some other homeschooling models), unschooling families spend time getting to know each other more fully.
Parents learn what drives their children; what brings them joy. Then, they help facilitate those interests and pursue those dreams, building bonds that will last a lifetime.
Curious how you can learn language arts and math skills in everyday life? Click here to see how we do it everyday! ➡️Lanaguage Arts and ➡️Math
The Cons of Unschooling
❌ The lack of structure can be challenging.
I am driven by structure and routine; therefore, a lack of structure can feel chaotic and unsettling.
Because unschooling does not follow a pre-determined curriculum, it can feel like chaos and confusion.
❌ Fear of missing out is real.
School pictures. Christmas shows. Class field trips and parties. Dances. Sports. These are some of the things I worried about when we first set out to homeschool.
Would my child miss out on these things? Regret not having experienced them? Be able to connect with others who were traditionally schooled?
The flip side to this coin is that as homeschoolers/ unschoolers, we get to experience so much more than traditionally schooled students do.
Want to spend a day at the creek studying fish? Go for it. Curious about how fast the hockey puck travels when you hit it across the driveway. Sure, let’s find out. Want to spend the day in Gettysburg at museums? Get in the car.
❌Comparison to others.
This was a tough one for me.
Most of my son’s friends are traditionally schooled. (Co-ops never worked for us, although we tried!)
At times, he would share with me that he felt like he was “cheating the system” and not learning what his friends were.
He listened to them mostly complain about school and homework. While he didn’t want to follow their forced schedules, he felt like he wasn’t doing enough like them and consequently was “less than”.
Those are words no mother ever wants to hear!
This would especially happen when they would compare the amount of school work they were doing to what they perceived him to be doing, or not doing, as the case may be.
This required a direct conversation. You cannot compare apples to oranges. These are two very different learning systems and not a decision that we made willy-nilly.
In the end, our children need to trust that we have made the best decision we can for them and their educational needs.
❌Criticisms from family and society.
I was fortunate enough to not be criticized by family members for choosing unschooling, though I was often asked to explain how it worked.
I get it. It is completely different from the accepted mindset of traditional schooling. Since I am an advocate for interest-led learning, I was always more than happy to explain.
Society can be a bit harsher.
You can find a lot of negative online information about unschooling. And you know what, I can get that too.
Remember, I was a naysayer at first, too.
Unschooling goes against everything we have ever been taught about education. It forces a shift in what society says is right.
And that is a good thing.
❌Parental time and engagement can be overwhelming.
Unschooling involves being keenly in tune with your child.
You must observe. Make notes. Follow through.
Your job as a parent is to provide materials, experiences, and opportunities.
This can be both time-consuming and overwhelming.
You cannot just open a boxed curriculum and assign certain tasks. That is not how it works.
You are a facilitator. A guide. An observer.
But I promise you, it will be worth it.
Common Misconceptions About Unschooling
😕 Unschooled children are lazy, undisciplined, uneducated, and unparented.
Full stop here. 🛑
Unschooling is NOT lazy, undisciplined, uneducated or unparenting. In fact, it is the exact opposite.
It is being involved in your child’s life. Guiding them, providing for them, and cheering them on as they pursue what brings them JOY.
😕They lack socialization.
Ugh. If I had a dollar for every time someone brings up socialization….
Socialization is not a problem. Really, it isn’t.
This post reveals how we address this issue, or non-issue!
😕Interest-led learners have learning gaps.
So this one may be somewhat true, BUT does it really matter? Don’t we all have gaps in our learning?
How much do you remember from every class you took in school? I’m going to assume that if you are like me, not much.
We remember, or learn, what is relevant to our own needs and wants. And when we need or want something, we learn it. The rest is just a time-filler.
It really is that simple.
😕They won’t get into college or have good careers.
No. Just no. Unschoolers can and do go to college and have successful careers.
Sue Patterson from Unschooling Mom 2 Mom, and mother of three successful adult unschooled kids, shares some great insights about Grown Unschoolers.
😕Unschoolers can’t deal with the real world.
Is traditional school the real world? Not in my universe!
Unschoolers live, learn, and succeed in the real world every day.
My education was interrupted only by my schooling.
winston churchill
Is Unschooling Right for You?
Deciding that unschooling is the right fit for your family can be a difficult decision.
When I first heard the term “unschool,” I immediately wrote it off as ridiculous.
At that time, I was struggling to home educate my son. What I envisioned as being a beautiful experience of homeschooling quickly turned into what felt like a nightmare.
That is what led me to begin searching for answers, and how I ultimately found unschooling.
As I said, I wasn’t sold immediately on the idea. But I did open my mind to it and began to learn more about it.
Maybe you are here as well. If so, consider this…..
Questions to Ponder if Unschooling is Right for Your Family
- Do you want your child to value education and see learning as a lifelong pursuit?
- Do you want to build connections with your child that will last a lifetime?
- Is supporting independence and self-motivation for your child important to you?
- Do you value an education customized to your child’s specific needs and wants?
- Do you like the idea of freedom and flexibility for your child’s learning?
If you answered yes to the above questions, then consider unschooling as an option.
Conclusion: Unschooling Pros and Cons
Unschooling has both pros and cons tied to it, as does traditional schooling.
Only you can determine if the pros outweigh the cons for you and your family.
Going against the grain can be scary. But your child is worth it. I promise.
Interested in learning how the unschooling movement began? Click here to read about John Holt, an American author and educator.